The Reassurance in the Heart
by morgan-va
Summary: Tag for The Party in the Pants from Season 8.


Disclaimer: I don't own Bones.

Laughter and celebration rang out, as the happy couple dashed through the narrow human path leading from the reception into the hotel lobby, ducking their heads as pink and white rose pedals cascaded over them. Meandering hotel guests paused, joining in the fun, with applause and smiles of their own.

The happy party continued their parade to the hotel piano bar adjoining the lobby, not ready to end the festivities. There were more toasts to be made, more hugs to be shared, more songs to be sung, more fun to be had. The honeymoon could wait for this family.

The black SUV slowed down, waiting for the car ahead to vacate a hard-to-find parking spot near the National Mall.

"Why are we stopping Booth?" Brennan glanced around, looking for flashing lights or some other signal identifying a problem. Booth had been anxious to get home.

He ignored her, sliding the SUV into the open spot, and turning off the ignition. Quickly he jumped out, and jogged around to her door, which of course was already open as she stepped onto the curb. He extended his hand to her, lacing their fingers together. "Let's walk."

She didn't hesitate. When he was ready to talk, he would. It was a pleasant evening in DC, though a little cool. She should have grabbed her shawl.

Hand in hand, they slowly walked the sidewalks of the National Mall, both content to converse in familiar silence with each other. For Booth, the fresh air from the light breeze, the memorials to the heroes of past wars, the monuments representing this great country, the touch of the slender fingers of his partner, all helped to ground him from a turbulent day.

Eventually, they stopped at the Lincoln Memorial overlooking the reflecting pond. Given his family history, it was ironic he sought and found solace here. At this location, at the entire National Mall, he was one of the good guys despite his roots. He took his responsibilities seriously, as a soldier, a FBI agent, a father, a grandson, a brother, and a partner. Family and country mattered to him at his core. Those beliefs and the associated guilt tied to not adhering to those beliefs drove his decision to attend the wedding today.

Brennan joined him on the steps, patiently waiting, giving him the time he needed.

Booth finally spoke up, his gaze focused on the Washington monument in the distance. "She seemed happy."

"Yes, she did."

"She deserves to be happy after the hell my father put her though."

"You made her very happy today."

He tilted his head towards Brennan. "I had to go."

"I know. You are a very good man." Her fingers tightened around his.

A small smile flashed on his face. Her endless belief in him never failed to make his heart swell a little larger. "She is my mother." She was family.

"You didn't want to stay longer? Everyone else was going to the piano bar afterwards to celebrate more."

He shook his head. "Nope."

"Why?"

He fell silent.

"Booth?"

The heavy silence lingered in the air. "I am still angry."

Brennan understood, better than most. It would take time, possibly a lot of time. "Did she say something to you?"

"It was nothing she said." He paused, not really wanting to inspect how he felt. He hated drama. Life was so much simpler if one could ignore the drama. "They seemed like a real family unit, Reggie, my mom, his kids. Their happiness was contagious. I couldn't help but join in and enjoy some of it with them." And he had. It had been a happy event.

"That's good, right?" His words and his actions were confusing to her.

"For them, yes. She has been a part of their life for so long, much longer than she ever was in mine." An ideal family, with a father and mother figure who loved one another and who loved the kids. Every child deserves a similar type life. A life he worked so hard to provide his own kids. "I just can't help wishing Jared and I had grown up in a similar family with our mother."

Her heart broke for him. He was a man who valued family above all else. She squeezed his hand again.

Booth kept talking. "I understood why she never came home. My father would have killed her." He would have too.

"Were you protecting her by never locating her?" It would be something Booth would do. Even though his mother disappointed him, he would never want to see her hurt.

"No. Maybe." It was complicated. "I think in the end, it was all so bad, we each had to survive on our own the best we could. Fortunately, Pops stepped in shortly after she left."

Brennan understood survival too.

"I don't want to be angry with her." It hurt, it felt wrong. "She is my mother, who lived through a hell no one deserves. A son is supposed to honor his mother." And a mother should love and protect her children. A difficult truth to ignore.

He lived by so many societal rules and codes. "You showed her compassion and honor today, Booth. Not many people in your situation would have done the same."

He turned to look at her again, drawing her attention. "You did. When your father was on trial."

"Because of you." The right side of her mouth curved up, remembering a long ago conversation. "Brain and heart, remember?"

He remembered well. But unlike Bones, today required him to turn off his heart and use his brain. In his head, attending the wedding and honoring his mothers' request, was the only outcome he could choose. Bones had been right about forgiveness. He knew the toll physical and emotional abuse left on families. It changed them. His mom had borne the brunt of it for years. She deserved some happiness, and some closure from a very dark time in her life. Even if the happiness she sought was with another family. But his heart churned furiously, screaming at him to walk away without looking back.

As the silence surrounded them again, the breeze picked up and in the distance the sounds of the flags surrounding the Washington Monument, flapping against the heavy poles, increased. The cool air felt good to him, a contrast against the turmoil he felt.

Not much time passed before he spoke again, unable to silence his thoughts. "She told me we had won, we had escaped the damage from my father, and built a good life."

Brennan remained quiet, letting him finish. It was rare he was introspective or this sharing.

"I think she is right. As individuals, we did win. Jared is happy and stable, building a family with Padme. She has been a family with Reggie and his kids for years." He tilted his head towards her, the first easy smile crossing his face all day. "And I have you, and Christine, and Parker."

She returned his smile.

"You all are the only family I really need." It was true. "And Pops, and sometimes Jared when he is not being a jackass." The truth allowed more of his anger to disappear. "She was right. You have given me the life I always wanted."

Her heart skipped a beat. "As you have for me." Against her wishes too. He'd somehow undermined her entire belief system to a point she couldn't imagine a life or home without him present.

Silence momentarily enveloped their space again, as his eyes drifted across the water. "My mother couldn't fight for me growing up in that house. But, later she simply didn't. She left. I may be able to forgive her, but I can't let it go, at least anytime soon." He couldn't stop the anger, even if he tried. He couldn't reconcile the mother who left him to the mother who loved her children.

"It will take time Booth. I still struggle dealing with Max."

Max. Booth knew she reverted to calling him by name to protect herself. Any day he could disappear from her life. The appearance of his own mother probably triggered the unease. For two people who were so different, they were quite a pair. God, he loved her so much.

With the breeze picking up, he wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pulling her closer to him. His eyes remaining focused across the water. "I am a very lucky man. You fight for me every day. If I'm not happy, you aren't happy. If I need time, you give me time. If I take too much time, you push. You even liked my mother because of me. Every day, you prove to me I am important in your life. It was a reassurance I didn't think I needed. I have always relied on my heart to know how people felt."

"I love you." She nestled closer against him, her hand resting on this leg. It was a truth she couldn't explain, but a truth nonetheless.

"I know." And he did. The evidence was clear. It explained why he always felt safe with her. He knew where he stood, with his heart and his brain. He was a lucky man indeed. But it was time to change the subject. Something else had been on his mind all day, something much more pleasant.

"So enough about my mother." A grin spread over his face, the weight of the world falling off him. "Let's talk about earlier…."

Oh no. The bouquet. She shifted to face him. "Booth, just because some silly ritual states whoever catches the bouquet will marry next does not mean it's true." She had been waiting for him to bring this up.

"Oh it's true." He pressed his finger to her mouth, to keep her from speaking. "But that's not what I wanted to talk about." Another image danced through his head. A very alluring one. His eyes darkened and his grin widened. "So about that striptease…."

The End


End file.
